Building a Successful Lifestyle Through Self-Reflection

Cori 0:00

Hey guys , this is Cori from Redefining Strength . Welcome the Fitness Hacks Podcast . This is the show where I share all my free workout and nutrition tips . I'm not going to ever fill this episode with sponsorships or ask you to buy anything . All I ask in return is , if you're enjoying the podcast , to leave a review or leave a five-star rating or , even better , share it with someone you think it might help . This will only take a few minutes and would mean the world to me and possibly change the life of someone you know . So let's jump right in .

Cori 0:29

I was trying to think about what the real secret to building a lifestyle , the secret to success , really was , and in reflecting on it I realized that's the secret to success Constant reflection and constantly trying to improve that self-awareness . So when we're thinking about building a lifestyle , it's always about assessing who and what we are and what we need to move forward from where we're at currently . I think so often we do set that end goal . We set a vision of what a program should look like if you find some ideal but we never actually consider who am I , what do I need , how do I respond to things and where am I starting from currently to set that GPS so I can actually achieve the location that I want to go to . So if you're just starting out , if you've been struggling to see the results that you want , instead of searching for a new perfect plan , instead of trying to fit yourself into some mold , assess what mold do I really need , based on who and what I am . Focus on building that self-awareness . I tell clients all the time in the coaching program I don't even want you to come out of this coaching program so much saying I know how to do this macro ratio or I know how to do this workout and I know that prehab is important , as important as prehab is . I want them to come out having a better self-awareness because they've had that outside perspective to question some of their beliefs .

Cori 1:40

Because so often we do get caught up in making the same mistakes , because we're not really reflecting on why those setbacks have occurred . We get caught up in looking at things in the same way we always have , because that's what potentially worked in the past , even if it was a short-term fix . So if we're trying to build a lifestyle , we have to recognize that things are constantly going to be evolving and changing and shifting and that the most important thing we can do is say , hey , how is what I'm doing right now truly ? How am I truly responding to it ? How is it truly moving forward ? Is it actually moving me forward Right ?

Cori 2:10

And the more we reflect on how things are truly working , the better off we're going to be , because then we can say , hey , at this stage of life maybe with it being the busy season of work or busy season with family I can't do these same things that once worked . I've had even clients say you know , like when I was single , I was doing all these workouts and I was going to the gym and meal probably in this way , and now , with the family , it doesn't work this way . Or when I had kids , at this stage it was different than now being retired and potentially having a lot more free time , where you think it would be easier . It's not right , but different stages of life require us to do different things and what used to work may no longer work simply because of those lifestyle shifts . So the more we can assess what we need at this time , the better off we're going to be . So through self reflection , we can really learn about ourselves and it's not just saying , oh well , how do I like this , is this good ? Or ? Oh , this doesn't feel sustainable . Right ?

Cori 2:55

We have to reflect on both our failures and our successes , and I say both because I think a lot of times we think we've reflected on things , but we haven't truly really gotten into the nitty gritty of why things worked or why they didn't . And with success , often we blow past it oh great , that worked , we achieved a result . We don't say , well , why did that work ? Right ? So the first thing I want you to sit down and do if you are starting a new program , a new plan , you're frustrated by your lack of results . You want to see better results is really assess past successes . Why do you think you succeeded in that case ? Why did something work for you ? Why did that diet feel sustainable at that time , right ? Maybe you do say , okay , what was the motivation of the time of year ? Or I didn't have some of the busyness that I have right now .

Cori 3:36

Think about what your lifestyle actually looked like when you were implementing that program or plan or doing those different things that led to success . What was even your pain of staying stuck ? I think a lot of times we don't think about the motivation that drove us forward at the time , right , that we maybe had some health concerns , or that we really couldn't fit into our clothes , or that someone else made a comment that really resonated with us , right ? And so the motivation now is different than it was then , which might not drive us forward . Or even thinking about the changes that happen with menopause and the frustrations there . Maybe this pain is very different than the pain when you lost weight before , right ? Or even you're seeing impacts to your mood and your sleep and all these different things , and that is impacting the pain of staying stuck . So think about these different things , because while we can't always change the pain of staying stuck , and if that motivation is different , we can't approach in the same way we can break down the habits , so the pain of change is less . So really assess what drove you forward at that time . How might that be different than what's driving you forward right now ?

Cori 4:31

And then think about the guidance and support you had . Who did you have in your life that was maybe promoting those healthy habits ? Who even led to the sabotage of them , right ? But think first about the success , like what drove you forward ? Who helped you on your way ? What were you reading ? What were you looking at ? What videos were you watching ? Even what helped lend itself to you feeling motivated and sticking with things through times that were tough . But think about the support . Think about your family , how they contributed , how maybe you've let some of those healthy habits even slide and how you can go back to that right . Think about the differences in your life and even your friendship groups that might be impacting things .

Cori 5:03

But think about what really made you successful in terms of the accountability and support and then think about what was the hardest change . So what was the hardest change that you made ? That you succeeded and pushed through the pain of , or pushed through the discomfort of , and got more comfortable being uncomfortable in that way , like , how did you actually overcome those challenges that you saw in the past ? Because as much as we look back and say , well , I succeeded , then you know what's wrong with me now . There was something that was hard that you managed to overcome beforehand , Even when we look back and say , oh , it wasn't that bad . Right , there was something hard , there was something different than what you were doing , because in order to see a new and better result , we have to embrace change .

Cori 5:37

So think about how did I overcome those challenges ? What were they ? How did I overcome them ? And then think would that still be a challenge now ? Is that part of why I've struggled to see a lifestyle truly built ? Is that that was a challenge that I could only overcome short term ? So think , would that still be a challenge for you now ? Because if it is , and maybe it's something that you did overcome for a really long time and now you can see , okay , well , this is how my lifestyle shifted , this is how I can overcome this again . You can use that previous knowledge of your success to help you overcome the same challenge or obstacle now . And if you know it isn't an obstacle now , even better . Right , you can move forward on to the next thing . But at least we won't repeat the same mistake , because we'll be learning from the past and then think how can you use even the lessons that you've learned from past challenges , that you've overcome past hard changes , to overcome something new now ?

Cori 6:24

A lot of times I might be reflecting on okay , well , this is how I really overcame that , not just like , oh , I didn't eat carbs and I lost weight , type thing , right , but okay , I had the emotional eating problem and you know , with doing this , I made myself more aware of my patterns that I repeated I tried to do distress or prior , so how can I now attribute that to ? Okay , I need to create new systems of my workouts . So maybe I need to write it down because that helped me , and maybe I need to make it conscious that I'm going to my workouts . So I'm going to put an alarm that alerts me , because that visual or that you know reminder right in front of my face really helped make an unconscious pattern conscious , where I'm defaulting to the couch instead of going to workout , right ?

Cori 6:58

So think about the strategies that you might have implemented with some of those past challenges and how you can even utilize those in different forms to overcome future challenges . Then think how'd you meet yourself where you're at ? Because the best changes always happen when we meet ourselves where we're at currently . So how did you break things down to really address what you needed then ? Because if you had just been self-controlling and willpowering your way through , those changes probably weren't sustainable , and that might be something you need to reflect on if that's why you're now back in this situation you don't want to be in . But think about times you have really succeeded , even if it's not a weight loss journey or a fitness journey . Think about other areas of your life that you've seen the success snowball that you really want in a new area of your life , and apply those same principles . Think about how you broke things down to allow yourself to move forward from where you're at currently . Again , assessing your lifestyle now , like what changes would actually meet you where you're at . How did you go about making those changes ? How did you keep positive mindsets when setbacks occurred ? Like what research or learning did you do to help yourself embrace the changes and move forward and trust in the process ?

Cori 7:57

But start to really assess your successes , learn from them . Don't just blow pass them , saying , woohoo , good job , I did a habit . Now it's ingrained , I'm going to keep moving forward . Think why do those habits become so easy to repeat ? Why are you now looking back at some of those struggles and being like , oh , that wasn't that bad ?

Cori 8:14

Really assess your successes and then reflect on failures . Okay , I know it's not fun sometimes to really reflect on why we haven't seen the results we wanted , why we made that mistake , but the more we can say , okay , this is why this happened , the more we can learn from it and actually leap forward faster . I like to say that failures are just learning . With frustration , they stink . Not going to tell you that I like failing , but I can tell you they have been some of the most valuable learning experiences . So I do embrace them as that you can throw a little temperature when they first happen , but then the second you can go back and reflect on them .

Cori 8:43

So , in reflecting on failures , think about . Why do you feel you failed ? What was the situation that led to the failure ? What was the mindset ? What was the actions ? You know what wasn't realistic in your plan ? Were you cutting out non-negotiables , things you really enjoyed ? Were you not owning your priorities ? Were you not allowing for changes with changes in the season ? Were you trying to only rely on motivation and willpower and not meeting yourself where you're at ? Why do you feel like you failed ?

Cori 9:07

And then think about were you too focused on some ideal ? Because I think that happens , right , we see , you know , on social media , especially all these ideals , six days a week , two hours a day in the gym . Do this , this , this , this , this , this , this , this , these bazillion different things . Right , don't eat this with this , only eat it with that . Right , there's so many details that we can dial in , which is opportunity , okay , to make things really work for us . But the first thing we need to know is what do we need ? Where are we at ? Because if we're trying to force a round peg into a square hole , it's not going to work . It's going to be really hard . Maybe we can make it fit for a little while , but it's not really the right fit . So , instead of focusing on an ideal , focus on where you're at and how you can move forward and make better over focusing on just the perfect .

Cori 9:48

And then how would you change the habits you implemented in the past , what habits simply weren't sustainable or what may have been too much , because sustainable is an interesting word . It might not feel sustainable to start , because it's not what you've always done , but you can build up to it feeling sustainable through repetition and consistency . But in order to be consistent with something , we have to be able to do it daily . So if you said , hey , you know , I want to really track macros and I want to track a specific ratio , and every other time you've tried to do it , you've fallen off within a couple of weeks , well , how did you approach that ? Were you trying to force the macros right away and get overwhelms ? Is there something like a minimum of just protein or an increase of protein that you could focus on first , or just tracking to implement that habit ? How could you break down those changes to make them less overwhelming so that the pain of staying stuck outweighs the pain of change instead of the pain of change pushing back on you ?

Utilizing Self-Reflection to Drive Goal Achievement

Cori 10:33

Think about you know . How can you even draw on some of your self reflection in your goals , like I love , setting those strong systems right , finding the significance , putting targets , creating repeatable actions , optimizing and owning those challenges , setting non-negotiables and then creating that action plan . How can you use your goals to really drive you forward ? Or where was there a lack of potentially that , a self-assessment in the past that didn't allow you to meet yourself where you're at ? And then , how was your mindset different there from when you've succeeded ? Often we relate back to only the habits we implemented . Oh , I did this diet plan . Oh , I did this workout right , I had this system that didn't work Instead of saying , well , what was the mindset difference ?

Cori 11:11

Because a lot of times the system was there , even that we could have used , but our mindset wasn't ready to embrace it . We weren't ready to embrace the changes . So think about the mindsets you had when you embraced the system , wholeheartedly , embraced the process and trusted in it and gave yourself just over to it , versus constantly questioning , dooming yourself with doubt . But really break down the mindsets behind the differences . You see when you failed with something and implementing new habits and you've succeeded , because the more you can do that , the more you can say okay , I feel myself approaching these changes , even with this mindset , or I see this mindset creeping in . What can I do differently to sort of shift how I'm implementing things , to work around it or address it right , to save ourself future struggles ? And then how would you get yourself out of your own way if this is creeping in ?

Cori 11:53

Think about , okay , I had this mindset happen in the past when I was implementing these systems . What was it there ? So , if I feel that coming back , what can I do ? Because sometimes results is an ebb and flow . Sometimes we are going really fast forward and then we have to back off the gas just a little bit . Right , we're not putting on the brakes , we're just backing off the gas a little bit , and we almost even do that to keep moving forward faster than if we had to fully push on the brakes .

Cori 12:16

So think about the mindsets and how you can really help yourself get out of your own way , and even have that questioning in place . I love to have reflection each week , doing all these different things of like what really worked for me this week , what were improvements I made , what were obstacles I struggled with . Okay now , in assessing the obstacles , what are opportunities within them , but even put it in place , you know where you have that alert to do this assessment each and every week to help yourself , keep moving forward . Because the simple fact is , the more you know about yourself , the stronger you'll be , because our self-awareness is really our own power to constantly evolve , because nothing is going to work forever not one macro breakdown , not one workout , and we want to have fun , even experimenting . But the more we own who and what we are , the more we can always address what we need to move forward , because that's ultimately what's going to work Often . We have a lot of great systems , we have a lot of great tactics , we have a lot of great knowledge even there , but it's taking action on it , and part of how we can take action is better knowing ourselves . So I want you to think you know what's one thing you really learned about yourself this past year .

Cori 13:14

I know it can be hard to reflect on failures and we can breeze past successes , but take time to really assess one of each . What's something that didn't work for you in the past year , in the past month , in the past week ? How can you now use that to move you forward faster ? And then think what do I truly need to move me forward ? Is it simply action ? Because a lot of times it's not knowing more . It's action . How can we get ourselves to take action ? That's the key thing . And then what's an easy change you can make today ? But the more we take time to really assess as awkward as it can be , as hard as it can be the more we can take directed action to truly move forward .

Cori 13:48

Thanks for listening to Fitness Hacks Podcast . Again , this is the place where I share all my free workout and nutrition tips . I'm never going to run sponsorships or ask you to buy anything . All I ask in return is , if you're enjoying the podcast , to leave a rating review or share it with someone you think it might help . This will only take a few minutes and it would mean the world to me and possibly change life with someone you know .